Guided Meditation for Parents & Caregivers of Trans Youth
This guided meditation is for all parents and caregivers of trans, non-binary, and gender-expansive kids. It was created and presented by Kelly Storck, LCSW, in partnership with Point of Pride. Below, you can watch the video and/or read the full transcript of the meditation.
We hope you enjoy this opportunity to relax, breathe, and reflect. You are enough, exactly as you are. Thank you for being you.
Hi, my name is Aydian Dowling and I am the Board President of Point of Pride. Today, we invite you into this beautiful meditation brought to you by Kelly. Kelly is a social worker specializing in exploring gender identity in children and adults, and the author of “The Gender Identity Workbook for Kids.” We are honored to have Kelly share her wisdom and experience with our community. Whatever brought you to this space, know that you are welcome. And now, we invite you to find a relaxing place to sit or lay for the next fifteen minutes. And we hope you enjoy Kelly’s mediation.
Hello and welcome, Beautiful People. If you’re here, you likely have a child or loved one who is transgender, non-binary, or exploring their gender. Perhaps they’ve shared more of who they are with you recently and you’re in fear or conflict or simply unsure how you feel. Maybe you’ve known who your loved one is for months or years and you’re beaming with love and pride. Every experience and every feeling is welcome here. I hope you find something in this meditation that nurtures your highest self and the greatest good for you and your beloved.
Close your eyes or find a soft place to focus your gaze.
Invite your body to begin to settle.
Become aware of your breath. I am breathing in. I am breathing out.
Become aware of the power held in your body. This body of yours can be trusted to do what you need it to do without force.
Let it breathe. Let it feel.
Now take a few deeper breaths and allow your body to transition from wherever you were before this meditation. Ask your mind to let go of any busyness or fretting that occupied you and begin to arrive more fully in this present moment. This moment.
If it feels helpful, you can choose a home base or anchor–some sensation or sound that helps ground you. This can be the feeling of your breath, a distant sound or the weight of your body in your seat. You can gently return to this anchor whenever you feel distracted or uneasy. Let it remind you that you are ok.
As your mind quiets and your body stills, notice any sensations on or in your body–the beating of your heart, your chest rising and falling with your breath, any movement of air on your skin. Notice any smells that you smell. Notice any sounds that you hear. Let your body open up and receive without your mind needing to do anything with what comes in. Let your body be a body.
Now notice how the seat that holds you does so unconditionally, without judgment. Feel the support it offers you and your body. Beneath your seat, become aware of the earth and the sustenance it offers to you and to all living beings. Feel your connection to the earth and all the ways it holds you, grounds you, and feeds you.
Turn your attention to your heart space or wherever you most readily sense or feel your emotions. Simply note what is there in this moment.
Then gently turn your attention to your thoughts and note what is there.
You’re simply noticing what you brought into this moment with you.
And with a deep and conscious breath, do your best to let everything be here and be ok. Whatever emotions, thoughts, sensations or distractions continue to be present, let them be here with as little pushing or pulling as possible. No need to make anything different. The world is what it is. You are what you are. Release any struggle or resistance. Let it all be ok.
Take a moment to pause in the space you’ve made for yourself.
We now call on the parts of you that care for a transgender, non-binary, or gender-exploring child. I am going to walk you back through parts of this meditation as you hold your beloved child in your heart or mind’s eye.
As you feel able, take a few breaths to help you transition from where you’ve been–the ways you used to know or understand your child, the things you thought you knew– to show up where you are now. Let go of old attachments–things you or the world may have believed were true or right–so that you may arrive to whatever is here now. Allow tenderness to permeate these moments with you and your beloved just as they present to you now.
Look for any tension or resistance that may be present and direct your breath to those places. Invite whatever it is you need–trust, surrender, acceptance–to show up and move you into greater peace. Let these supported breaths wash over you and any conflict, hesitation or fear that no longer serves you or your child. Feel free to allow this release to make noise if needed. Let yourself sigh, cry or moan as a way to acknowledge the weight you are releasing.
Gently notice the ways this release can bring you into the present where your beloved exists just as they show and tell you they exist.
Notice any urges to change this reality and let that go as many times as you need. Feel it rise up then feel yourself consciously release it. Let it move on through you. No need to cling or strain to gain wisdom from these places as they do not hold what you need.
Now begin to embrace the belief that you and your child can be trusted to know, feel, say and do what is needed to thrive.
If you continue to feel tension around your child at this moment, let your next breath invite a wave of radical love and acceptance that brings in one more long exhale of surrender. Lay it all down. Let it be.
Let your child be your beloved child.
Recalling the support and sustenance of your seat and the earth below you, imagine being the energy that provides that support and sustenance to your child. Feel your connection to them – all the ways you’ve loved and cared for them over the years, along with all the invisible but profound attachments that bind you to each other. None of these need to be dictated or restricted by your child’s gender or gender expression. Let your deep love for your child ground you.
Now gently notice what emotions and thoughts you hold now.
Do your best to let everything you find be welcome here with you. No need to make anything different. If discomfort lingers, accept it as a part of your journey. Let it all be here. Let it all be ok.
The world is what it is.
You are what you are.
Breathe in. Breathe out.
Your child is just who they are meant to be in this moment. Everything will unfold in time. This brilliant human is showing you that they love themselves enough to live fully and openly as their truest self and they have now given you the honor of knowing them more deeply. This is an invitation to a deeper, fuller, and healthier relationship.
Breathe in love, breathe out peace.
You’ve got this.
As we near the end, take a moment to thank yourself for your practice. If it feels good, you can bring in any movement or sound that helps you expel or draw in what you need. And as you’re ready, you can open your eyes and take in your surroundings with a fresh light. I hope you feel more grounded in your love for your child and the amazing beauty and possibilities that exist when you are in an affirming relationship with them. Please come back and revisit this meditation any time you feel lost, worried, or disconnected. My wish for you is to continue the work on clearing any energy that is interfering with your ability to support a free and celebrated life for your child. May we all be free of suffering and may there be more peace on the planet. Take care of you…
Thank you, Kelly, for sharing your time and talents with the community. You can learn more about Kelly and her work below. And thank you for taking time out of your day to show up for trans youth in your life.
About our meditation leader:
"Hello, I’m Kelly Storck. I have been a social worker for over half of my life now and have spent the last 15 years as a therapist in private practice focusing on supporting the wellness and freedom of trans, non-binary and gender-exploring humans of all ages. I am also the author of The Gender Workbook for Kids, a book I forced myself to write only because I wanted all the little humans to have a way to see and explore their gender in a supportive and affirming way. Most of all, I am deeply fortunate to love many trans and queer humans who are the greatest gifts of my life. I believe in a better world for us all, especially those we have misunderstood and marginalized along the way. I don’t pretend to have it all together but I do find that love, truth and justice-seeking can help us build lives that hold maximum meaning, joy and contentment. May you keep finding your way to yours…"
Written by Point of Pride
Point of Pride provides financial aid and direct support to trans folks in need of health and wellness care.