Electrolysis Grow-Out Phase: Coping With Facial Hair Dysphoria

Let’s talk about one of the hardest parts of hair removal that nobody really prepares you for: the grow-out phase. The process of getting rid of facial hair often means temporarily having more visible facial hair than you have had in a long time.

It is a cruel irony, and it is one of the most common struggles we hear about from our Electrolysis Fund recipients: "I didn’t realize how intense the dysphoria could feel during this part of the process."

If that resonates with you, you are in the right place. This guide brings together advice, coping strategies, and wisdom from other trans folks who have been exactly where you are and made it through to the other side.

The grow-out phase can feel so hard

Let's validate this right away: having facial hair grow in, especially if it’s something that you’ve spent years trying to hide or remove, can trigger intense dysphoria for many of us. 

You might feel stuck between wanting to move forward with hair removal, while also wanting to protect yourself from the pain or discomfort of having visible facial hair. That contradiction can be exhausting.

Many trans women and femmes feel blindsided by how hard this part of the hair removal process can feel, like it should have come with a warning label. The most important thing to remember is that this phase is temporary and purposeful.

While this phase can feel overwhelming, many trans people also describe it as the moment they began to see tangible progress—proof that something permanent and affirming is underway.

Why you have to grow your hair out for electrolysis

When you’re preparing for electrolysis, visible hair is essential, and here’s why:

• The provider needs visible hair to treat the follicle correctly. They insert a tiny probe into the follicle to destroy it permanently. If they can’t see the hair, they can’t find the follicle.
• Visible hair helps target active growth phases. Electrolysis works best on hair that is in an active growth phase. There's a ton of science behind it, but all you really need to know is that  visible hair helps your provider treat the right follicles.

How long does the hair need to be? 

Your hair should be about 3mm long (roughly the width of a classic wedding ring) so it's long enough for the provider to grab with tweezers.

Most electrologists recommend you stop shaving about 3 to 5 days before your appointment. (Plucked or waxed hair cannot be treated properly, so you'll have to stop waxing, plucking, threading, sugaring, or removing hair by any method except shaving for 3 to 4 weeks before treatment.)

If you’re unsure about anything, ask your electrologist—requirements can vary slightly.

Coping strategies for the dysphoria of visible hair

Here are real strategies that trans folks use to get through this phase: tried, tested, and recommended by people who’ve been exactly where you are.

Wear a mask

Wearing a mask in public is still common and can be an effective way to reduce dysphoria while your hair grows. Silver lining of the 2020s and COVID pandemic: masks are now socially acceptable, and if asked, you might choose to tell people that you’re not feeling well or just being cautious! (You are being cautious—about your mental health and well-being.)

Change up the lighting

Consider where you spend most of your time and how lighting affects your dysphoria. Warm or indirect lighting can ease visual triggers at home.  Soft lighting is your friend. Avoid fluorescent lighting if possible. 

Schedule strategically

Try to book your appointments on days that you can stay home a day before and the day of. If you work in person, consider planning this around PTO or slower weeks. Some people take a personal day before and/or after treatments to avoid social situations when they need recovery time. If taking time off isn’t possible, even small adjustments—like scheduling late-day appointments—can help.

Consider color correcting makeup

A peach or orange corrector can hide facial hair shadow very well. Full coverage foundations can also be very helpful. There are countless tutorials on YouTube specifically for covering shadow. The right makeup can be magical!

Try out new accessories

Scarves, high collars, hats, and glasses can redirect attention. Wear outfits that make you feel affirmed in other ways.

Use grounding techniques

If your body feels activated or overwhelmed at any point, gentle grounding can help bring your nervous system back into the present.

• Hand on your chest with slow breathing. Sometimes the simplest thing is the most effective. Just breathe.
• The 5-4-3-2-1 method: Name 5 things you can see, 4 things you can touch, 3 things you can hear, 2 things you can smell, and 1 thing you can taste. It helps pull your mind out of a dysphoria spiral.
• Focus on parts of your body, appearance, or personality that bring you joy. Even one small area can help redirect attention.

Managing social interactions

Navigating social situations during the grow-out phase can feel especially vulnerable. It’s okay to move through this time in whatever way feels most protective and supportive for you.

You don’t owe anyone an explanation for your appearance. Your boundaries matter, and you get to decide what—if anything—you want to share. If it feels helpful, having a simple, neutral response ready can make interactions feel less stressful. Some options might be: “I’m preparing for a medical appointment.” or “I’d rather not talk about my appearance right now.”

During the couple of days you're preparing for electrolysis, spend more time around people who make you feel safe, affirmed, and understood—whether that’s in person or online. Being around those who see you as you are can make a real difference on harder days.

And if social media starts to feel challenging, it’s okay to take a break. Stepping back from photos, comments, or comparison doesn’t mean you’re avoiding life—it can be a form of self-care.

Getting emotional support on hard days

• Reach out to someone supportive: Connect with other trans people who understand (online communities, local support groups). There's something powerful about talking to someone who just gets it.
• Rely on your people: Let trusted friends know you're going through a tough time. You don't have to go into detail if you don't want to. Just "I'm having a rough week" is enough.
• Consider professional mental health support: For some folks, additional mental health support can be helpful, especially if dysphoria starts to feel overwhelming or hard to manage alone. A therapist with experience in gender-affirming care can offer tools and perspectives that support you through this phase, at your own pace.
• And when you can, gently remind yourself: this part of the process is temporary. Getting through this takes real courage.

Wisdom from other trans folks who’ve been there

Sometimes hearing from others helps the most. Here’s what past Electrolysis Support Fund recipients have shared about life on the other side of this process.

“For the first time in my life, I can live freely as a woman. I can finally live freely on the outside, to the female that has been hiding all my life on the inside.” –Jackie

“Because of electrolysis, my quality of life is immeasurably better. It has been truly life changing. I do not have to wake up with dysphoria every day.” –Kay

“Hair removal has enabled me to move forward with my long-term goal of becoming more independent. From now on, anyone I meet will only know the real, happy, and thriving me.” –Gwyn

"Access to electrolysis means I can make progress toward my dreams in my career. I can see the difference between who I am now and who I was before.” –Vivienne

What to expect after treatments

Many folks experience redness, swelling, bumps, "pepper spots" as follicles purge, and irritated or dry skin. The discomfort can compound dysphoria. Your face is healing and doing important work, but it does not always feel that way in the moment.

The important thing to remember is that each session brings you closer to long-term relief and smoother skin.

Self-compassion matters more than anything

The grow-out phase is one of the most vulnerable parts of transition-related hair removal. Be gentle with yourself. You deserve that gentleness, especially now. There will be a day you shave for the last time, and you will not know it is the last time. Future-you is cheering you on!

You’re not alone

At Point of Pride, we see you. We know this journey is not easy. You are doing something incredibly difficult because you deserve to live authentically and comfortably in your own skin. You deserve that comfort. You deserve that authenticity.

If cost is a barrier to starting or continuing your permanent hair removal journey, Point of Pride's Electrolysis Support Fund may be able to help. Applications are open annually from February 1 to February 28.